Life and trauma

[Former-Member]

@Jynx it's very frustrating and overwhelming. 

I'd rather try to not talk about it but things may still come out, so I'll apologise in advance if they do. I do all sorts of arts and crafts but at the moment the main thing I've been doing is colouring, it keeps my hands busy so I can't hurt myself. Unfortunately the mind still races no matter what I seem to do which is why I bounce from task to task as I struggle to stay focussed. 

[Jynx]

Of course, totally respect that @Former-Member 

I don't mind a spot of colouring my own self! I was gifted this book called 'crap colouring in' once, it was pretty funny - just funny little illustrations of stuff like the toilet roll running out, ripping the pull tab off a can without it opening, all life's lil frustrations! Nothing like finally going through the brown texta by colouring in pictures of poop! 🤣

Whatcha working on at the moment?

[Former-Member]

@Jynx that definitely sounds like a fun book to do. I have a heap of funny ones with swear words in them which are always fun to do, not something I can post here though. At the moment I have some bookmarks that I'm colouring in, they are just smaller pictures and take time to get every little detail so it's just keeping my hands busy for as long as possible. I was doing some Disney ones but I had to take a break from them as the other day I got triggered using the sharpener (yeah i know it's stupid) to sharpen pencils. So at the moment I'm sticking to textas or pens. 

[Jynx]

@Former-Member that's not even remotely stupid hun. None of us have control over what triggers us, it can be the smallest, seemingly most insignificant things. Our brains are just REALLY EXPERT at pattern recognition so we can see something that is like, only related by the most minor of associations and the brain is like 'Oh time to hit the panic button then!' 

Oooh cool, are they bookmarks you made or ones you bought to colour in? Are they themed or anything? 

[Former-Member]

@Jynx it's just really frustrating to be triggered by them cos colouring is really the only thing I have at the moment and I don't want to lose that.

I brought them at officeworks the other day, there is different themed ones. So i got the animal one and mandalas. But they had buildings, flowers, birds and patterns. 

[Jynx]

Yeah for sure @Former-Member that's such a valid concern! Random thought, but is it the specific sharpener, or shape of it? Could you find a different one? Or more like, the experience of it? Also, please do NOT feel like you need to go deeper into talking about it if it is feeling unsafe/ick for you to do so 💜

Ooh yes I'd have picked animals and mandalas too! Are they all for your own usage or are they gifts? I might have to scope em out!! Gotta go to Officeworks anyway for a 2025 diary, and of course try to resist buying pretty pens 😅

[Former-Member]

@Jynx it's any sharpener, I have a collection of them but I use the blades for other purposes. Its never affected me before but the last few days it has. It was just out of nowhere the other day that I just had horrible visions and I freaked out and had to walk away. I tried to continue with the colouring using the pencils but everytime I needed to sharpen one i just got triggered. Anyway that's enough of that subject now. 

Officeworks is a dangerous place, so many fun and pretty things to buy. I don't think I've ever walked in there and not walked out without buying something or several things for myself.  

[Jynx]

And their gel pens and big piles of sharpies and stuff @Former-Member totally a money hole!! But so so pretty 🤣

[Former-Member]

@Jynx yes, they have such a great collection. I've spent more money in there than I care to admit 🤣

[MJG017]

@Former-Member @Jynx 

I dont do much arty stuff these days, but some of the pens and textas you can get these days!  If they had some of these when I was a kid, i definitely would have become addicted.  I love those pens with the glittery ink inside.  I think the last ones i used though were some pens full.of acrylic paint.  I got them last year to try painting some detail of some 3D prints i was doing.

Not to open up the subject of sharpeners again, but when i was in school they had these crank ones... later became powered... but the used the grinding wheels to sharpen pencils rather than blades.  I wonder if you can still get them and if they would be far less triggering Gremlin.