Lived Experience Forum

[Maggie]

Coffee coming up @CheerBear 

3 today could be better. I’m glad you had a good day at work yesterday, hope the same happens today.

My day is looking ok enough. I have a lot of tidying to do. Cleaner help tomorrow. A different person, as my normal lady is on holiday. She has 3 kids, and holiday, so work could be a break. 😏😏

[CheerBear]

Thanks @Maggie. Sibling helped yesterday which was a huge relief. They have almost no work now and that's getting worse not better. So much is getting worse not better here 🙁

How long is this new cleaning person going to be coming for? That's a curveball 😑 Have you met them before?

[Maggie]

You are right about things getting worse where you are @CheerBear . I just couldn’t imagine living in those awful looking buildings, let alone being in lockdown in them. Let alone what everyone is going through again. It’s really hard.

I’m really pleased sib helped yesterday. You are so good to them.

The new person is a curveball, for sure. My lady is only away for 1 week, and I could easily have managed. Last time she had off, there was no replacement, so the phone call was unexpected. No, never met her. I’d like to cancel, I might do that.

My ED has kicked in hard. An attempt at control when all else seems out of control, some tricky to upset the balance.....did I say balance.......where.

[CheerBear]

I'm horrified, along with most of us here @Maggie, though some not and some with attitudes I want to set fire to. Hugely disturbed by it. Those buildings have always felt so, so bad. Now... I don't know what to say or how to feel or what to do. I'm disturbed by the news, the feeling of being here in this city, this country, where this can happen. Thoughts of being trapped, controlled, powerless. Each morning I feel nervous waiting for the news, holding my breath waiting for announcements. Struggling lots with it all now. That's my little spill and rant.

Would it help to cancel cleaning help, especially if it is a one off for now? I can only imagine how difficult the thought of tomorrow is.

I am sorry your ED has kicked in. Does that happen often? There's a lot that's out of control. I get the need to feel like you have control over something. Ultra frustrating and difficult that ultimately it's one that has control not gives control 😔

[Maggie]

@CheerBear  Being here on our ‘ safe’ island, as many refer to it, doesn’t separate us from those who are caught in the midst of this ongoing drama. I can imagine the extra stress, a second wave, a second everything, with more added. We know some things now, or we know how long term lockdown feels. Still many unknowns. I was talking to counsellor on Friday about not being able to turn off news etc, even knowing it is having an adverse affect. I seem to get glued, rather than removed.

I feel for you, and everyone in your city. 💙💙💙

Yes, it would help to cancel. I’m anxious already, and it’s only Tuesday 🥺🥺

Yes, I know the ED has control rather than gives control. It’s always ticking in the background, but becomes the elephant in the room too often. It’s a tricky time on many levels. Sometimes, taking steps forward involve other steps backwards.

[CheerBear]

I hope the rest of the country is watching and learning how to and how not to respond to this @Maggie, but I fear lessons are not being learned and smug attitudes are taking over. I don't know when we stopped being one country and became 7 vs 1. I'm disappointed in so many ways. I am finding myself glued also. Sucked in maybe. I can't turn off from it. Need to return to the country and the shed and my drill and saw and maybe some fire I think 😉

Sorry you're anxious. Strangers and something so personal and needing to be safe (like your home) don't mix well.

I am also very sorry if my post above didn't land well. I am sure you know EDs as well as anyone, and know the control paradox. It's so tricky. Having little control over life doesn't work well for brains that have been scrambled by lack of control causing so much pain and trouble. Sitting with you in the tricky and then some, caring a lot, knowing you are doing the best you can with what you have.

[Maggie]

@CheerBear  Your post landed well. It’s reality. I’m trying not to be annoyed at myself, but it’s not working. Thankyou for sitting, caring and understanding. Unscrambling is tricky, being controlled uncomfortable. Thanks for saying I’m doing my best. 💜💜

@CheerBear  I think a country ‘ time out’ ‘ tune out’ sounds like an excellent idea. I hope you light some fire. 🔥🔥🔥 You too are doing your best, remember that.

I might not hear from you for a few days, but take care. Rest, relax, eat, sleep, build, start fires, and dream. 😘😘🥰🥰

[CheerBear]

Thanks for the reassurance @Maggie. Unscrambling really is tough 🙁❤

I don't think we'll get to the country, as much as I know it would help. It's too risky now. Our suburb is full of a bug but not locked down because it is absorbed into a postcode, which makes no sense. But I can dream of fire 😉

I have to head off now before I am late. Can't blame traffic these days given it is a 3.5 second commute to the office 😆

Big love to you ❤

[Maggie]

@CheerBear  I wonder if you could bring the country to you? You might not have your tools, which I’m presuming might be the case. But an escape to penterest might be a tiny substitute. 👍👍 There’s alway dots to make mess with. 👍👍

I hope your 3.5 second trip to the office was eventful. 😂😂😂

I cancelled tomorrow, that felt so much better. Having a break from cleaning at the moment. Dropping off a late morning coffee. ☕️☕️☕️💞💞💞

[Appleblossom]

@CheerBear @Maggie 

Yes we have to remember the general social situation and not take COvid related losses personally.  Though Bunnings was doing good business while so many other businesses going down.

@Maggie  Ah ... Oh ... I actually lived in the estate that is currently in the media for 7 years during my early teens.  It is weird, the aged care place my mother died also made it into newspaper shots.  Coincidences and woooo ....  Our family really was at the bottom of the pile. I was grateful when we moved there as it was better than what came before.  Recently I saw they were pulling down the 4 storey walk ups where we lived.  I used to be slightly envious of the towers as they were newer and had elevators and better heating ... LOL ... shows how much I knew.  There were all sorts of people there.  Good and Bad.  Stigma about public housing is still hard.  I know thats not what you meant. You were showing sympathy.  Mum was grateful to go into the Aged Care place, she had a hard lonely life too.

What really upset me was the heavy handed police presence rather than community wkrs.  It is what it is. 

Hope you dont mind me sharing that.