Lived Experience Forum

[Ophelia]

How is everyone coping?

I was ok for the first few weeks but I'm starting to really slip in to a bad place. I'm home schooling 5 year old and have 3 year old. I still send him to daycare 2 days a week. 
husband is working at home, locked in office and working longer hours than when he went to work. 

im feeling like I can't cope anymore. Meds don't work for me, therapy doesn't either but you can't get it anyway. 

my daughter broke her arm in 2 places two days ago. I had to take her to the hospital and watch them break it again and reposition the bones whilst she was under gas. She's been in pain ever since, and obviously can't do anything. So she's in lockdown and also can't go on the swings or ride her bike. It's too much. 

there's people worse off than me, I know. But my mind is starting to break all the same. 

[Owlunar]

Hi @Ophelia 

I really do understand how you are feeling right now -  it is pretty bleak for everyone but moreso locked-down with 2 small children with your husband locked in his study working more hours than normally - so what can you do?

I think it's important to tell your husband - after all they are his children too and he needs to stop for for a while and give you a break from the kids so you can self-care - something that is not at all selfish and very necessary for your mental health - the long term plan is getting though all this chaos and after all - we are all in this together

I am sad to hear your little girl broke her arm and is till in pain - which is normal - personally I think a five-year-old doesn't need home-schooling - I remember when I was in Grade Preps the reason we go to school for the first year is to learn how to be at school and learn some simple things - while she is in pain I personally think that learning to read some simple words and do simple sums can wait for a while and let you comfort her in her pain and fright from what happened

It's harder when you are locked-down with two small children. I get this most of all - it's nearly 50 years ago now but I would put my two kids on the pram and walk for miles around here and I still live in the same area and know everything so well - and then - my saving was to walk and walk - 

My first child was hyperactive and had other problems - I can't imagine what it would have been like to have had to experience lock-down then. Trying to do other things around the house with two children needing - well - entertainment I think - would be so trying but I also think that for the best part keeping them occupied is the only way to go - and this is where your husband can help

He needs to get out of that office for his own mental health too - so please talk to him - and perhaps your GP too. It is a very hard situation atm and you do need help

All the best with this and welcome to the forum too. I am so glad you reached out - you do need help and what we do is provide conversation and suggestions

My best thoughts

Dec

[Judi9877]

Hi @Ophelia and welcome to the forums! Nice to meet you👋! I read that you are in lockdown and are experiencing some issues. I'm also in lockdown in Melbourne and I know that there are lots of others in NSW, ACT and i think parts of Queensland as well which isn't great. 

I'm so glad that you have decided to ask for help on the forums as that is very brave of you. I will admit that I struggled with lockdown in the first few times here in Melbourne but I have slowly learnt some strategies to cope like calling helplines like Lifeline and the SANE helplines.  I do know that in Melbourne there are certain numbers to call but as you didn't say which state you are in, I'm not sure if this would be relevant to you such as EACH for example or Beyond Blue. 

For me, I find that taking time to do some self care activities are helping me like journaling and doing craft activities like knitting and crochet really help. What are you interested in? Do you like reading? Maybe going for a walk in the fresh air for some time out might help or just sitting down with a warm cup of tea or coffee might be your thing? I know that you have children so maybe trying to do some fun indoor things might work like dancing to music or planting a vegetable garden or flowers if you have space? Coming on the forums is a great way to connect with others might also help as I have discovered forum members to offer great advice, especially on the Sydney and surrounds Lockdown Thread , the Re: Self Care Activities and for a rewarding experience to celebrate daily achievements no matter how big or small, the Daily Achievements! thread. I hope these suggestions help!

Take care forumite!

Judi9877☺️💐

[LostAngel]

hello @Ophelia I have to say I understand I myself am not currently in Lockdown but have been through many Lockdowns as Im sure mostly everyone has over the last 2 years things seem to get better and normalish only to be back in it again I am currently feeling angry about family members who are currently stuck in Lockdown in the Melbourne area,although things are pretty much no different as I lack my own transport to get around for time being and have pretty much been housebound except for mental health appointments ect not to take away what your going through by any means,your poor daughter  and your family must be under so much stress ,and also the inability for people to have outlets outside their home to relieve built up stress ,but you deserve support particulary emotional support and social connection I hope you choose to reach out to the forums as well as any other contacts to help you vent maybe friends or family ? and is there any self care activities that usually help ? please take care 

[LostAngel]

@Judi9877  and @Owlunar I just want to say that these suggestions and ideas are Beautifull to support our ne forum friend sending hugs to all

[LostAngel]

*New

[frog]

Hi @Ophelia Welcome to the forum. I'm sorry that it's so tough right now. It's a very hard situation.

I hope you find some connection here with people who understand.

Did the hospital provide any indication on the likely prognosis for your little girl? It might help to be able to look forward to some improvement for her, and you.

Maybe on the days your youngest is in daycare you could catch your breath a little and plan something that's just for your own wellbeing. Are you allowed out for exercise at all? I am where we are and it's helping me to get a walk in. Do you have a garden. I have a tiny courtyard and it gets a bit of sun in the middle of the day. That's another thing I look forward to.

Agree that if at all possible, let your husband know that you need breaks.

Hi @Judi9877 @Owlunar @LostAngel 

Hang in there everyone. I'm thinking of you.

[LostAngel]

thanks @Judi9877 much appreciated 

[Ophelia]

Thank you so much for the responses. I will try to reply. I'm just feeling so shit right now. I can't even put words together 

[Judi9877]

Hi @Ophelia . It's okay not to feel okay. Respond anytime you choose to. There's no hurry, forumite. Just know that I'm thinking of you in lockdown as I'm currently in that same situation in Melbourne. It's not much fun and I can understand that there are some pretty big feeling around the topic and situation.

Take care.

Judi9877☺️🌸