Hi Voices
My stepdaughter, who, to quote Love Actually, turns out to be the f**king love of my life (but not in a creepy way), recently disclosed to me that she hears voices, lives with voices, talks to voices - that the voices have personalities, names, etc.
Backing up a bit. The disclosure came after I found a note. She'd been acting differently, secretively, for a few weeks, and the note confirmed why. She was pursuing a crush with a guy she'd met online, even though she was in a long-term, supposedly committed relationship with this lovely young woman. I confronted her after giving her the opportunity to share with me. This behaviour went against all her espoused principles, and mine, infidelity, and then she disclosed it was one of these voices, these as I know now 'alters', that had initiated and pursued this relationship. Oh how I long for the days when I could think of her as being an untrustworthy, selfish, despicable, young woman for cheating on her girlfriend.
In the meantime, I spend every waking moment scared for her - mostly in tears when I'm doing things about this. I've researched dissociative identity disorder like there is no tomorrow. I now know so much about it, but in doing so, it's raised more questions than answers for me. Existential questions. My entire world has been turned upside down and I don't know what is real anymore.
This on top of a chronic anxiety disorder of my own. Yeah, I know, fun, right?!
Anyway, Voices, stay strong. Don't give into self-wallowing. Research. Go to ChatGPT and ask questions. Treat yourself in the third person ... which is kind of weird given that you may be living with different personalities inhibiting you, but treat yourself like your best friend. What would you do if your best friend came to you with this problem, with this concern, with this fear? You'd be compassionate, right? You'd be loving and caring. Do that with you. Be that with you. And seek help. Never be afraid to ask for help, even when you ask the wrong people. It's you and your best friend that you're helping, and that best friend is you.
Look after yourself Voices. It's confusing, painful, scary, terrifying even, but accepting it and then seeking to know about it and dealing with it, in the third person as your own best friend, will help.
