Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Former-Member]

Does anyone have stress reducing -self care- boundary tips for the upcoming Christmas season?

@Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Jkate @Adge @outlander @Mon0497 @sunflowers @Smc

[Faith-and-Hope]

Yeah .... pace yourself, plan and prepare early (November) or keep it really, really simple.  You need to relax and enjoy the time and the people.  It’s hard to do that if elaborate food menus and cards written under time pressure are on the agenda. 

I love making special foods, so Imake one or two, then buy everything else ready, or make it as simple as corn cobs cooked in the oven as a side dish.  

Same with shopping and and wrapping gifts - I start on November 1st.   

We organise a tree-dress-up “party” with the kids on a night in early December, and a tree-take-down “party” on a night in early January ..... with music and nibblies.

[Mon0497]

Hi @Former-Member

Every Christmas I buy a board game that we are allowed to open first, just after dinner,

The nuttier the better. 

It works so well, the family and their partners love it.

So yes I try to make nice food but its the board game that everyone looks forward to.

We do crackers and read the bad jokes and wear the funny hats and then we open the game that "mum has got" 

90 percent of the time I have got it right and the night works beautifully.

Avoid compettive games like monopoly and find ones that make you laugh.

Like celebrity heads and taboo and pictionary, and even one year kerplunk.

It breaks the stress, we all look forward to it and it sets everyone up for all the other stressful events.

As my children have got older, now young adults I have also found technology toys work really well, so for example last year cheap drones from Australian Geographic were a huge hit.

I do start looking about August to try and figure out what might be fun.

Often the cats get the best gift and that seems to work as well, everyone gets joy from watching them investigate their new toys.

It can be exhausting but i just love the joy it brings to everyone and how this has become our tradition.

So I guess what I am describing are distraction therapies.

Good luck

[Faith-and-Hope]

That sounds wonderful @Mon0497 ..... 😊 .... and yes, we need distraction therapy .....

Pleased to meet you.

[Shaz51]

sounds wonderful @Mon0497 

[Former-Member]

[Smc]

Ummm... I've still got some decorations in place from last year... does that count... 😛

Am thinking that this year, instead of putting out everything in the decorations box, maybe we could do a themed decoration, so that it feels a bit fresher and different. "Vintage" appeals to me.

I've usually got too much left to the last minute. I keep hoping "maybe next year" I'll be more organised. But I do usually get the cake and pud done well in advance. I try to make those to enter in our town's November agricultural show. No-one in the family is offended at eating a cake or pud that the judges have cut in half to sample. 😉

We usually go to the Christmas morning church service, so the last few years I've cooked the roast a day or two before, and warmed it up to serve with freshly cooked vegs at lunchtime. That takes out a big stress-factor item.

I usually still end up too uptight and with too much to do at the last minute, but I honestly enjoy the chance to have a special celebration with family... so as such it's worth it, but will be better still if I can make it more relaxed.

One sort of "extra" thing re. Christmas. I like to make it a time to encourage others. I have made a habit of putting up cheerful, creative and funny social media posts through December, because for too many people Christmas is a sad or stressful time. My hope is that I give my online circle of friends something to make them smile in the middle of everything, and to maybe give them a different perspective. And then there's the fun thing of occasionally surprising someone with a small "mystery gift". One friend randomly gets little packages of her favourite confectionery (sometimes Easter, sometimes Christmas, sometimes whenever), and I'm pretty sure she hasn't worked out yet where they've come from... mheeheehee...

[Former-Member]

Loving the secret gift giving @Smc - how do you do it so that the recipient knows that it comes from a trustsworthy source? 

[Former-Member]

@artistmom

You might find some helpful tips in this thread.

[Faith-and-Hope]

I am guessing the fact that they are her favourite tells her that it is someone who knows her well ......

@Smc @Former-Member