Lived Experience Forum

[ucancallmebetty]

hi. im my daughters nominated carer and mother. She is 21and recently put under the mental health act and medically hospitalised. She was released from hospital and was told she had to sign the management plan which entailed she had to keep seeing her outreach mental health team or they would send her to a mental health unit. The trouble is she is happy to do that as long as she has a change in her case worker as she is terrified of her. I tried to talk to the case worker and asked her if there was something she could change in her aproach but she told me it was my daughters brain that was the problem. I pointed out that my daughter was able to form postive relationships with other people except her and she told me that she was the best person there and everyone agreed. She also told me that I dont care for my daughter only she did. I feel this case worker has a lot of power and could easily send my daughter back into hospital just because she doesnt like her. We havnt heard from the mental health outreach team since the phone call which is quite concerning. I'm not sure who I can talk to as I feel that they just think I am the trouble and will try and stop me in supporting my daughter. This relationship she has with the case worker is not a positive one and is inhibiting her recovery. She has requested a change in writing and verbally but has not heard anything. She is concerned that as they are only hearing or listening to the case worker her concerns and my own are not being taken into account. I am not aware of who I could talk to about the case workers behaviour and even if I did say anything would I be listened to or even make things worse for my daughter.

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @ucancallmebetty ,

Thanks for reaching out. It's a tricky one. I've been cased managed for years. Resources are stretched. It could be a logistical issue that they cannot give you another case worker. But this doesn't mean you should not be heard.

I would contact the unit/service manager to share you concerns. These concerns should be respected, esp if your daughter is vulnerable and is scared of the assigned case worker. Please bear in mind, as I have mentioned, case managers are hard to come by, esp being in the public system at this time. So this may mean a wait which perhaps is not ideal for your daughter at this time.

I've been with area mental health teams for a long time, and there are people who WANT a case manager but cannot access one. So in a way, i think it's a good thing you actually have a treating team behind you. Another thing, I don't believe the system 'enjoys' putting people in inpatient units for 'fun' or 'for the sake of it', esp if the consumer has a willing and able carer like yourself. I guess sometimes, clients are acutely unwell and really need that support.

There is no judgement on my part, particularly as I do not know the extent of your situation. I am purely speaking out of experience.

I hope this is somewhat helpful. But once again, I also completely understand your reservations in relation to a case manager your daughter does not get along with.

Take Care,

BPDSurvivor

[ucancallmebetty]

Thanks for reply. Very much appreciate any feedback. Not sure if there is a service manager at AOT as have not really been aware of how the system works. I work in education so I know if there is an issue with a teacher a parent can go to a principal but I am not aware of a similar person that could mediate in improving the relationship especially if the case worker does not want to talk to me

[Owlunar]

Hi @ucancallmebetty 

This situation does need to be investigated regardless of whether your daughter's concerns are reality or not. It doesn't matter what the Case Worker wants in this regard - you both have rights too

I have a CW myself - in the first instance I had an excellent one but she retired. The next two or three were disasters - I complained and the lady I have had now for years is very good - it is worth speaking to the people in charge of the agency about this and sorting the matter out

Also - there are other agencies in charge of the service providers so you can go higher. You have the right to do this and for you daughter you really do need to. It is not right that you and your daughter are either afraid of have concerns that are not be addressed

I wish you the best with this and encourage you to take the initiative - it's not easy - I know - but it needs to be done. Not all Case Workers are good at their job

Dec

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @ucancallmebetty ,

Yes, there is a 'head' person. Give them a call.

BPDSurvivor

[BPDSurvivor]

Which brings me to another idea. Once we have a case worker/manager, we are then a 'case'. Sad eh? Seems like all humanity is sucked out from the vulnerable, making them no longer a human, but a 'case' with a number attached...

There's currently a huge push to focus on humans as a whole person, rather than decontextualise and label those who deviate from the 'normal'. What is 'normal' anyway?

Just something to think about @ucancallmebetty @Owlunar .

BPDSurvivor

[ucancallmebetty]

thanks for your reply. It is very hard. They are very intimidating as they hold a lot of power. Very worried I will make things worse. Thanks for your reply though. I'll will see if I can get a name or number of some manager above her

[ucancallmebetty]

I have experienced a lot over the last 6 months dealing with mental health practitioners for my daughter and I will say that I am shocked and very disappointed in their harshness, language used and indifference to the impact of their decisions upon a humans life that they have complete control over. Until you become a part of the mental health world you don't really understand how bad it truly is

[Otter]

Hi there @ucancallmebetty !

So sorry to hear of your difficult times with the public MH system and thank you for your support on the Forums and sharing of your lived experience. It definitely sounds like you had some negative and overwhelmingly frustrating times seeking support.

Just wanted to flag that good things can still happen within that system and encourage people to keep reaching out there or through the system from where they are able to navigate as no two professionals or services are the same and it can take a few goes to find decent support within any arm of the system, just as a way of encouraging people to keep trying to reach out even if you are initially struggling as this can be really worth it.

Hope you are well and thanks again for sharing!

Kind regards,

Otter

[Owlunar]

Hi again @ucancallmebetty 

No one has the right to be in complete control of other people. It may seem as if the Control Worker has just that but my thought is that it is gained through being tough about issues and giving less thought than wise. I can't tell

We need to be assertive and know we have rights. This can be exhausting I know. We need to insist and persist with our insisting.

I wish you the best - I know it is not at all easy

Dec