Mental Health - Education, Support and Prevention
05-05-2025 06:42 PM
05-05-2025 07:05 PM
05-05-2025 07:05 PM
Aww @avant-garde honestly me too. Sucks when day of rest is not restful.
05-05-2025 07:06 PM
05-05-2025 07:27 PM
05-05-2025 07:27 PM
I appreciate the offer @avant-garde it means a lot that you would make that space for me. I think I have spent a lot of time in processing-mode and would now just be going in circles. Plus it is a work in progress (relationship conflict) so I am more in a waiting/limbo space than a venting/unpacking space.
What about your difficult day, does it need space?
05-05-2025 07:30 PM
05-05-2025 07:30 PM
05-05-2025 08:33 PM
05-05-2025 08:47 PM
05-05-2025 08:47 PM
@avant-garde I'm sorry to hear you're in that space hun, it's a rough one. Sounds like stuff needs to get out?
05-05-2025 08:50 PM
05-05-2025 08:50 PM
I trusted him to tell me... I trusted him to warn me... he didn't... he didn't say a word...
His brother in law told me there's a chance Delilah would be at church... chance... likely... not definite... not conclusive... possible... always possible... therefore difficult to prepare... possible means possibly not... which is always anyway...
I knew it would be bad if that possible happened...
But i trusted him to tell me... he didn't tell me... he didn't tell me...
I saw her and my breathing turned to rasps, I started panicking, shaking, my voice disappeared, I couldn't sing, I did well to last as long as I did... nobody noticed when in the middle of a song I walked out...
I woke up on the concrete outside @Jynx
There were people around me...
I didn't know them...
They wanted to call an ambulance...
I said no... church... inside... get someone...
I saw the brother in law (BiL) and his wife, the BiL is usually hit and miss with me... he actually helped this time...
I saw them and burst into tears...
I can't get my voice out of my head "don't make me go back" over and over again... very panicked... the BiL stayed with me... even with counting bricks...
I didn't expect such a violent reaction from me... I was out for 20ish minutes... it was terrifying...
05-05-2025 09:32 PM
05-05-2025 09:32 PM
@avant-garde I am sorry hun that sounds terrifying. You had an expectation of someone to help you prepare, and they let you down. Then the worst happens.
That hurts.
And also processing the intensity of it all sounds like it is a lot to sit with too.
05-05-2025 09:33 PM
05-05-2025 09:33 PM
Just writing it out... the feelings have started to resurface...
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