Lived Experience Forum

[Tay]

Yes we do have all our own things to deal with but it doesn't make yours any less - prayers and positive thoughts on the way xxx

[Chris]

Ive got alot to think about after group today. And i really dont know if i have the courage to ask for support. Lots of emotion has come up, and right now i am struggling to not push it away, and to let it just be. I know when emotion comes up, i run for the hills. I am trying to stop running. Thank you Tay for your thoughts and nik for your continued support..

[Chris]

Feeling nervous  about my appointment  tomorrow . Apparently  i was talking as though i have cancer in group today.. well thats me catastrophising  again. Thinking of all the possible scenarios. Think the worst and hope for the best. Came home exhusted, not that is unusual for a Wednesday.  Consumed a whole block of chocolate. Didnt help any, just made me feel sick. I want to go to bed and block it all out, and let it be tomorrow morning. 

Hmm feelings  comming to the surface? Fear, anxiety. I want to run away from the feelings.its what i always do.. its hard to acknowledge that and to sit with it. I dont want to do this alone, but at this point i cant ask for help or support. Its like i would be a failure to do that. I should  be strong enough to cope with this on my own. Im starting to feel fragile, and its unnerving me. I cant let this get the better of me. Roll on tomorrow. 

[Former-Member]

Hi Chris,

I tend to castrophise as well... but its almost never as bad as we imagine.. almost always (not to minimise whatyou're going through though)! I can relate to the feeling exhausted after group, there have been times ive come home from my psychologist session feeling so exhausted that i can barely think straight. Its hard work. I guess while you don't necessarily want those feelings to take over your whole life, its really good that you're acknowledging that theyre there and there is good reason for them to be there right now. It is a scary thing that is happening for you. I'm very glad that your appointment is tomorrow, at least it wil be over with then. 

Will be hoping for a positive result tomorrow and sending strength over the airwaves 😄

LJ

[Appleblossom]

@Chris You seem like a very strong person to me @Chris.  So much family struggling with health issues.

I find it interesting that you say you are ok coping with operations ... I am a bit like that ... is it stoicism or just being used to it? I dont know ... you seem to second guess yourself about doing the right thing in reaching out for help or managing solo ...  self acceptance is so hard. You are the one who knows the best what forms of help are actually helpful to you.

Go gently

[Chris]

My appointment went about how I expected. She went through the possibilitys, and then said we need to take it a step at a time. First the d & c. Booked in for two weeks time. I felt quiet calm through the whole process. Did all the paperwork while I was there. Next thing is to ask my husband to take that day off for me. That way I won't have to say anything to my children. If I end up having to have a hysterectomy I will tell them. No point in worrying them all over nothing now.

[Sakurapuss]

Hey @Chris I hope today is better for you and that everything is settling down. It sounds like an incredibly stressful time for you!
here's my rant...does anyone get so anxious that they feel they're going to vomit? My workplace didn't like me taking time off for my MI so they sent me for a fitness for duty assessment. The 'independent government psychiatrist' said while I had issues, I was ok to work. Good and bad. Good as the workplace can't fire me for being 'unfit' but bad because now the workplace are overloading me and saying taking time off is unjustified. I spoke with my psychologist last night and she said I shouldn't be afraid of all the 'alleged' and 'perceived' in the report but that if an ordinary person in HR reads it, it sounds like I'm making everything up. I can feel myself sliding down into the hole again. Apart from breathing exercises and taking a few short breaks away from my desk, does anyone know what else I can do? I'd love to take days off work but that's exactly what they want me to do

[Chris]

Hi Sakurpuss. You may have seen from my other thread that my sister overseas is termanally ill. Were not expecting her to be with us much longer. Family are basically keeping a bedside vidual. Im doing ok. Its all a bit surreal, but at the same time im realistic to the situation.

Anyway to your problem i can only address your anxiety and nausea. If you like ginger you could try ginger tea. You can get it in tea bag form, or you could grate some fresh ginger and infuse it. Ginger beer is good too. Brand is a personal choice. I like saxby, or kirks. The other thing is you could talk to your dr to see if there is something he could prescribe to help. Hope that helps

[Appleblossom]

Great idea @Chris I have been drinking lots of ginger tea .. maybe I subconsciously knew that effect ... as I get nausea too.