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Senior Contributor

Sister Withdrawing

I live with my sister who has battled depression since mid 20s after a miscarriage. Theres survived a few suicide attempts and self harm & hospital admissions. I'm not officially her 'carer' as such but I care a lot. Actually worried at the moment as she's withdrawn a lot, teary and not eating, not talking much, not showering and won't take calls
Not sure if I should just wait for it to pass as I think its related to an anniversary related to a major loss a few years back, but with her history it frightens me I might lose her. Its been 6yrs since her last mental health admission and I thought she was going good but this last couple weeks, its bad. Just looking for advice, thanks.


Re: Sister Withdrawing

HI @silhouette have you spoken to your gp of your concerns? If you can get your sister to go with you and open up a bit I know there are psychologist health packages available for free ... 10 sessions I think ... called BOMBH. I have used them in the past and they have been most useful.

Unfortunately people have to crash before anything is done these days (at least that was with me) ... do you have family nearby that can help ... it is alot to shouldner on your own. 

Re: Sister Withdrawing

Thanks for reply @greenpea, sis was seeing Psychologist last year but said she needed a break from it, and that counselling doesn't help much. No family close but each other, we all talk on the ph regular. She seems to be takes her antidepressants still. Probably just a slump. She didnt come home tonight so hope she's OK, doesn't tell me everything 

Re: Sister Withdrawing

That's hard @silhouette would be good to get her to see her gp again with you maybe as support. It is alot for you to cope with ... maybe another psychologist more tailored to her needs would be the go. Her anti depressents may need to be readjusted as well. If you could get her to open up to her gp that would be a great start.

Re: Sister Withdrawing

Thanks @greenpea, Were watching a movie, comedy, she actually laughed. An old favourite "Money Pit" Tom Hanks.

Re: Sister Withdrawing

@silhouette ahahaha! That is great news. I am really happy for her and you. She is lucky to have such a good sister as yourself looking out for her. ps: I love Tom Hanks!

Re: Sister Withdrawing

@silhouette Hi silhouette! How is everything going today? Smiley Happy

Re: Sister Withdrawing

@greenpea, do you have any Mental Illness in the family? Or suffer yourself? Its horrible.

Unfortunately its pervasive like diabetes in our family tree. Schizophrenia, personality disorders (esp VPD), anxiety, depression++ bipolar, cPTSD.

Nobody copes well in our family, which makes it hard to trust anyone for the role of NOK or even just to talk to. I often feel lonely.

But here I am, with sis, which in some ways is "better the devil you know" & I do feel a lityle useful now.

I've come up to stay with her as this time of year she often goes under (withdraws and self harms), and being so 'boarderline' - services are stretched and bounce her back out in the world on her own. Its horrible there's no community support. Just someone knocking on the door once a day, or better still, organised to bring her morning tea & sit & listen for 5min on the verandah or front garden.

But maybe, to do my bit for her, with little semblance of life myself, i'm convinced a good diet and company can make all the difference in getting through the silly season. God knows her other siblings can't do it. Nor her parents. I'll step up, but only till March at this stage, wanna travel a bit.

Sis has agreed to check in with GP, so today made apt this week, see how it goes.

Trying to persuade her to get back into sewing today. Uncluttered the spare room (her kids no longer need) and take it over for her sewing.

Cheers Silhouette 🌓

Re: Sister Withdrawing

@silhouette Hi silhouette I have bp1 and schizoaffective disorder. I also know how hard it is on the carers because I am the carer for my son who has a mi. It is tough all round as there are not enough services for the carer or the individual with the mi.

Christmas is such a hard time of year ... there has been alot of discussion on the boards about how people are going to deal with it ...  everyone is feeling it atm.

This is a very friendly group who will open up to you and give you a warm welcome regardless of whether you are the carer or have the mi. You are most welcome to join any of the discussions. 

I am really happy that your sis has decided to see her GP that's is great. The ball is now rolling in helping her improving her situation and your's for that matter. Make sure you look after yourself, carers need r and r it is a hard job.

Re: Sister Withdrawing

Thanks @greenpea, I think its hard because the givingvis so one-sided. Nothing coming in, even gratitude. Mostly. And outsiders don't get it. My situation is mild in comparison.

Cheers 🌓

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