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Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

@outlander

I am having my xrays at the end of this week will make the appointment in the morning & should be able to get them done on Thursday or Friday.
I am feeling very positive about the outcome of the treatment to stop the pain & give me a better quality of life, so that I can get out of this house more than just to go to Medical Appointments. xo 🙂

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

This is really great news @Former-Member this new gp sounds rather good and like they actually listen to you. Its hard to find a good gp. Maybe its worth sticking with this one? I hope the xrays go well and theres nothing too serious going on. Maybe they will work out properly what is causing you all this pain!
It would be great to see you out and about. I remember the trip you took with a family member a few weeks ago and had a blast. You need more of that even if you go on your own.

Love and hugs @Former-Member ❤

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

Hi @Former-Member
Are you new in SF, I don't think I have seen your name & Avatar, before, sorry I don't mean to upset you by saying that.
I care about you, & I thank you so much for opening up & being brave sharing your shocking past with me. I think that you are wonderful, no exaggerating I am proud of you to be able to come through such horrible past experiences as a child & come here to say such kind & loving words from your hurting sad heart to me? Wow I want just hold you tight & hug you, smile at you & call you my sister & my new friend, if that is ok with you? My family don't care about me, I have 4 sisters & they are gossipers, & all are wealthy, yet are mean & labeling me as mad, & other names that I can say at the moment, maybe I will open up in this thread if I feel I can at a later time. But its horrible & disgusting what they are saying about me behind my back as I found out a few years ago & its so awful & shocking that I can not deal properly with it at this moment I will just put it away until I am stronger, & I will get stronger soon I believe.
You & I can learn to look after ourselves together, does that sound good to you @Former-Member   🙂
I will sit with you & hug you anytime you need me to I'm good at hugging & comforting people & I love to help people, I have soft heart, but I'm no door mat that's for sure, like some have wanted me to be, (not here in SF) I'm talking about in my life.
I'm teary thinking about what that evil Foster Carer said & did to you its like a horror story, only its true in your life.
You can come back & talk to me & other in this thread anytime, I want you to ok, please!
((((BabyDragon))))
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Bella I love you 🙂

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

hi @Former-Member how are you going today?

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

@outlander

Not good I have too many frightening memories flooding my mind & I'm sitting here in a strange sort of numbness & feeling very unwell but in a strange way

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

thats a rather strange feeling @Former-Member have you been in that sort of state before? has anything helped previously with the memories or emotions?

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

@outlander
I prayed, & I took my Med for my nerves to calm me down. I had surpressed so many off the acts of abuse against me, & I got triggered & some shocking memories from my past came flooding in & I saw it in my mind as if its happening all over again I am shocked that I have been so abused like that no wonder I have such terrible nite maries & sickness other than body damage from the accidents outlander I can not understand why & how I let these things happen to me why did I have it happen to me I have never been abusive or fighting I hate fighting I hate abuse I have such a caring soft heart why did these men hurt me so much & even my youn ger brother did something disgusting & sick to me & wanted to do worse & I got away from him & I am in hiding from him I have been for years because if he finds me he will come try & do that to me & he is 6'4" built like tank & has a mental illness from drug use, & sexual disease from being addicted to sex. I am frightened of him

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

@Former-Memberfirstly NONE of it is your fault. not one bit of it and i know that is really hard to believe but it isnt your fault ok. what those other men done to you is on them, they make us beleive its our fault, make it a secret, make us feel ashamed, dirty, embarrassed, disgusted because they dont want to live with that guilt so they place it upon their victims and walk away like nothing ever happened. thats what they do, and that is not your fault. 

the dreadful about trauma is when you release some of it even on here on the forums as you have done, its like opening a can of worms and once its released it can be hard to contain again. everything just flows out. sometimes out memories and thoughts from them get shoved so far down we dont understand where the nightmares are coming from. 

often the horrible things happen to those with soft hearts, or kind and giving natures. people prey on that. they see it as a weakness but it really isnt. 

 

Bella.. when these things were happening did you get any support from anyone?. are you getting some support or would you be willing to see someone to come and help you with these in the ways of a support worker or psych at all?

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

also @Former-Member ^^ 

those memories your experiencing i was told are  called sensory flashbacks. they arent very nice at all. its like experiencing the bodily sensations that occured as well as being able to visualise it. 

often with mine depending on how bad they are i can see, hear, feel, and smell what is going on. 

have you ever heard of these at all? 

Re: I am- Overwhelmed & Traumatised I need your support!!

No I have not
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