Hi @Till23, good to hear from you again.
Please don't feel like you need to apologise for not being around, i completely understand how hard it can be when in a tough place mentally, it sounds like that's where you've been, and i'm so sorry things have been so difficult for you. I don't know what was said on the forum to you, but it's upsetting that someone would say anything hurtful or upsetting to you. To anyone here really. If this can't be a safe space for us, then something is very wrong. I know it can be really hard to return to somewhere after something like that. Even if it's just feeling invalidated it hard, so add more on top of that and it's completely understandable you took some time away. Like I said though, i'm just sorry you had to go through that.
Personally, i'm very happy you're still here. Not just for myself obviously, but hoping it means you're feeling like you're in a bit of a better space mentally. I'm always happy to chat with you if you need it, or even if you just need to vent or take your mind of things. I just hope you're doing okay now and feeling better.
As you've noticed, I haven't been around much lately either. Similarly, I only come on if i'm tagged in specifically, because that would just be from you, or one of the others I've made a bit of a connection with. Most of them have disappeared so I haven't had a reason to come online. I just think there's people better suited to offer wise words to people here. If it's cancer or adoption (or attachment) related then I feel i can help, other than that I'm just not sure I can offer much. As they say "stick with what you know". I think i've just (finally) focused a bit more on myself. So continuing my adoptee's counseling and psych sessions about the cancer. It's really difficult to find people who will openly and honestly talk about the mental struggles of both and it makes it very isolating. But i'm not telling you anything you don't know. And please don't take any of that as any sort of pressure to stay here. If you feel it is ever too much for you to come online here, then that is what you have to do and I fully understand. I guess I just wish there was something I could do to help in that situation. I guess we all feel like that though when someone we know is struggling.
As for me, I'm doing okay thanks. Well, you know... okay. Had my latest oncology appointment a couple of weeks ago, and yet another PET scan in a couple of months before I see him again. So not much i can say (or do) about my situation until then. Just trying not to think about the possibilities to be honest. The best ones are just the least worst of a bunch of bad outcomes. But whatever happens, at the moment they're all possible worries for another day.
Thanks for asking about my partner's dad. He's back at home. Getting a bit of in-home rehab as he's still a bit unsteady on his feet, but doing well otherwise. I haven't really done much course work since last term. My lecturer gave me a short course to do over the holidays... 'working with people affected by adoption', after a chat we had about the PASS service at RASA (Relationships Australia SA) looking at the possibility of peer workers next year, and i'm doing my course with them so of course I said I was interested. I've done one short-ish assignment (mine never seem to turn out short) but motivation had been lacking for a lot of things the past few weeks. I think it may be something with all the hospital visits with my partner's father and then after all of them, my own oncology appointment... it just sort of hit me i think. You thing you're handling everything okay, and then something just triggers and you realise that there had been something building for a while. A bit like that idea of putting a from in a pot of water and slowly bringing it to the boil so the frog doesn't notice. While sitting in the oncology waiting room, a funeral ad on the TV there certainly doesn't help.
Other than that, getting ready for September and prostate cancer awareness month. I already have one possible TV spot lined up with the PCFA's PR people. A segment to talk about the support group and why I started it and how it helps. It's mainly to raise awareness about the Long Run fundraiser. I'm entering again this year, but got a few of the guys from the group to form a team this year. We've even set up a fundraising night... some musical bingo thing that is apparently popular at the moment. We've raised enough so far to cover costs plus a bit more so it's going well. It's only been a week and we've sold 2 tables and gotten a donation that has paid for the venue and the guy running the bingo so it's going well so far. We have another month to sell the rest of the tables and get donations for raffle prizes and things so hopefully we can raise 2 or $3,000 from it. Then add that to what each of raise individually with the Long Run and I've set our goal to $5,000 so we're a good chance at making that which would be an awesome result! Plus if I can get some media opportunities again to spread the word about getting tested then it's a huge win.
Speaking of huge wins! That is fantastic news about you doing that work for the State Health Department! What an amazing opportunity to do some really great and important work. How are you feeling about it? Going from our chats here, it's hard to imagine they could have picked a better person for the job. I'm sure you'll smash it!! 'Congratulations' doesn't seem right considering everything you've been through to be in the position of doing this job, but I'm sure you can help a lot of people and much a big difference.
