Lived Experience Forum

[eth]

No words would say how I feel.  I wrote about the facts elsewhere, but not my feelings.  

Huge empathy to everyone here.

[nashy]

Sending every good vibe to you @eth 

[BlueBay]

Thanks @eth 

hugs to you 🤗❤️

[Razzle]

Thanks @nashy 

Ive avoided as much media as possible today.  I don't care where he's headed or what he's doing.  Unless they show his car crashing into a ball of flames I don't need to watch his every move through the media.

I went for a huge big walk yesterday afternoon around our local creek.  I find water very calming so it did help shift my mood.  I've just done the same walk this morning and feel ok.

[Razzle]

@Jacques 

It does feel like CSA is tolerated at times.  I don't blame you for feeling like that.  Hope you're feeling better

today.  ❤️❤️

[Razzle]

Hi @BlueBay 

I understand how stuff like this affects you too.  I haven't been very active here lately, but I do get on and read

what I can when I can.  I have been trying to keep up with your thread, you have always held a place in my heart.  I know this latest news won't sit well with you but please know you are supported and cared about by others that have walked a little in your shoes.  Take care my friend ❤️❤️

[BlueBay]

Hi my friend @Razzle 

I miss chstting with you   I often think of you though and wonder how you are. 
thanks for your support with this. I'm ok. I'm not going to watch tv about him. It's a waste of my time. 
Take care ❤️💐

[Former-Member]

Hi All,

did you read the press release from witness J ? Such an amazing person.
I also appreciated the outpoor of support towards survivors since the verdict.

I hope you're coping ok. I try to keep busy and distract.

[Jacques]

hi @Razzle 

im really struggling to get past this, a few people on the news seem to find it funny that pell got away with child sexual assult and they are systematically destroying the character of the accuser. my heart breaks for the two buys who where sexually assulted by george pell. 

i went searching for the school i was abused in, no one has made alligations against them yet, i have been thinking lately that i was the only one abused there. 

i don't know if i will ever be able to let this go 😞

[Razzle]

@Jacques 

I must admit, I can't see why the media are even giving this man the air time that they have.  There is now an ad to say he is going to give his side to the story.  This bloke is going to sit there and lie to everyone without a care in the world because he thinks he has gotten away with it - and the media are reveling in it 😡. Once again the offender is rewarded with no regard to his victims.

I would doubt you were the only one at your school Jacques, but when you haven't heard of anyone else it just

proves the level of power these abusers have over us, how plausible it is to not speak up for years and years - and now how afraid people are to speak out when they get away with it anyway.  

At 8 I was assaulted by a group of 4, a couple of weeks later 1 of that group got to me again - I'd stake my

life on it that he in particular would have other victims.  At 10 my mums best friends son got to me, I'm sure I was a victim of opportunity, I don't

know if he would have hurt anyone else.  

The last one when I was 11 was a friend of the family that had moved here from overseas to live with his son and his sons family.  He was every description of a paedophile.  He groomed myself and my parents and got away with it for 2 years before the
family moved away.  I'm dead certain I was not his first, and I doubt I was his last. 

These events happened 40+ years ago, and the only people that know what happened are my husband, a councillor and my best friend.  

For people to say those boys lied or why did they wait so long to say something have no idea just

how hard it is to speak up - ever.  And to say that the boy that died had told his mother it didn't happen therefore it couldn't have, have no idea what it's like to want to protect other people's feelings.  Years after my abuse stopped my mother confronted me as something happened and she had an inkling something had happened to me.  She asked me straight out if he'd abused me.  I looked her dead in the eye and said no, nothing ever happened.  I never wanted her to know that this had been happening right under her nose.  He'd threatened to harm my parents if I'd ever said anything to them - and I believed him.

I understand that feeling of not being able to let it go, I don't think anyone could, particularly if the offenders are still roaming around on the loose.  I'm hearing you Jacques,  I'm not a victim of the church but this result does have an effect on us "non church" victims too, because if someone so prominent can get away with it so easily, then what chance do the rest of us have against unknown insignificant offenders.