Lived Experience Forum

[Sans911]

No, I don't really want to talk about anything @outlander. I'm extremely tired too, which is only making things worse.

[outlander]

Thats ok @Sans911 no words needed.
Hopefully the hot milo will help you sleep abit too.
I will be up for a while so i can sit with you till your ready for sleep 💛

[Teej]

@Snowie  I hope the written agenda helps next time for your pdoc. I know for me I can write things I'd be way more afraid to bring up verbally in my sessions. It's a starting point for discussions as well. It's been a game changer for me.

@Sans911  sorry to hear you are feeling so low still. I wanted you to know that after my appointment yesterday I just came home devastated and overwhelmed. I had to take meds to calm down and sleep off my urges to sh which were pretty high. They came from that feeling of hopelessness that I didn't feel understood or that I wasn't capable of change. Writing what I wrote to you did help me to get through knowing that what I preached I needed to accept for myself too. It was one session like many others but then there are sessions that I feel like I've been understood and have been able to take steps forward. I felt like a complete hypocrite last night after re reading what I wrote to you. This morning I'm through the darkest part and the urges dissipated.  I'm wondering if you can think about the hopes and dreams youve had for others you've dealt with and then try self compassion to think those things for you. 💜🤗. 

[Snowie]

@Teej @Sans911 💌💌

[outlander]

u ok? @Sans911

[Sans911]

Not really @outlander but I'm safe. I just didn't how to word it.

I have a new wound opened up that's leaking a lot. I rang the nurses this morning, and had to go to the clinic. I was seen by a nurse and a couple of drs, but nothing they can do but wait until I see the surgeon on a couple of weeks. I'm just gutted, and I can't manage the emotional toll of this any more

[outlander]

im sorry about the new wound thats opened up now @Sans911
are you able to get a second opinion from another surgeon? i know the current one seems to be trying but maybe a fresh perspective on treatments and moving forward might be better and give abit more hope atm?

[Whitehawk]

Hi @Sans911 

I am so sorry to learn that you are really struggling. Feeling gutted is certainly a hard emotional place to be. Are you able to keep yourself safe tonight Sans? Please look to your safety plan if you need to access some supports and strategies.

I really hope you are able to get some solace and sleep,

take care

Whitehawk

[Sans911]

I think another surgeon would probably refuse me @outlander. I know my current one was on the edge of contemplating some surgery, and I certainly won't be leaving her room until some decision is made. I can't discuss what I want here unfortunately. I'm just so distressed and teary tonight. I'm considering calling a helpline but discussing such personal, intimate information is a challenge. I don't know what else to do.