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Looking after ourselves

Sandy-66
Contributor

STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

70A0F325-0C5F-4049-9554-172D8631A329.jpeg

 

 


I've chosen to share my thoughts, experiences and journey under "Looking After Yourself " 

 

The importance for me to share and get this message out is to make change, see change and encourage and educate others to do the same. Using our voice whilst in the midst of mental health issues is not something we do well for many reasons, believing you deserve to be treated a certain way because it's become your truth and also through lack of self compassion, confidence we accept much more than we deserve or is acceptable not only in our lives personally but within the mental health system as a whole and for myself this is my story that I hope no one else will have to endure or suffer through into the future as we all push to make changes in a very broken system as a whole. 

2007 I was diagnosed with BPD and then I wasn't aware of the perception of the label until it very quickly became apparent. I was living in a very manipulative and abusive marriage and it was so sinister I couldn't myself identify what was happening behind closed doors that emotional abuse and gaslighting slowly sent me crazy and I believed it was me and gave into the game and life from there spiralled intensely. On that first admission my partner told his web of lies because I wasn't sure or even capable of understanding what was happening for me and his story became the foundation for the years ahead and my diagnosis came about from what he shared with a purpose and plan and I had very little input in assisting the professionals with my own version. In their eyes I fitted that criteria perfectly and exhibited all the behaviours that came with my label. 

Honestly I had many admissions over the last decade throughout my marriage, long and short stays and I soon was subjected to caregivers and professionals negative, rude and unacceptable treatment with me on what they went on solely in notes and incorrect assumptions made about me by everyone else but me. That history that remained current in the system was the first thing pulled up and I was powerless to change it when I thought I was in the right place with the right help and didn't identify what was happening for me? I had no voice, I was never given an opportunity to express what I was going on in my life as a whole and share my thoughts, feelings and confusion which is what I was desperate to understand. Consequently from there forward my behaviours were seen as unacceptable and attention seeking and was time after time treated and talked to by most like a child never seeing anything deeper than my presentation in their opinions and judgment of me became so disrespectful and more damaging than they would realise. But I kept going back repeatedly seeking refuge from my madness even though I hated it, it became often my only solution and better than where I was at. 

 

I truly believe that it's improving but was recently very disappointed whilst in ED for 48 hrs for my mental health that I experienced the exact disgusting treatment like past experiences from a RN that treated me so disrespectfully and even to the point of negligence. What he said to me was evident he had already judged me on what he saw and read on system notes and knew nothing else about why I was even in hospital. I won't even repeat what he said because you can imagine. I'm not the best at being assertive or standing up for myself, that's a lifetime of no confidence and avoiding conflict at any costs even when it directly affects me and my mental health.

 

The thing I wanted to really emphasis and encourage others that I put up with stigma for many years but when they totally let me down and stopped services a couple of years ago at the most crucial time in my life I was lost with what to do. So I wrote a long letter from the beginning of my journey in the public system, giving every detail up until that day and I wanted to be heard and with my own idea I researched who could I give this to, to read and make a difference and I went down the path of advocacy in mental health and emailed my story to two organisations and within 2 hrs they both replied and couldn't believe what they had read and they both were so effective in getting things in place immediately and looking at this problem. It was very liberating to be heard by people that can make sense and change. I didn't even know about advocating for myself and a lot of people wouldn't know the process either. 

so I made a decision a couple of days ago to advocate for myself once again and deal with what happened in ED.  So I've started the process and I was even advised that the negligence concern for one could be taken to APRAH let alone the attitude and treatment. 
They asked me what outcome I'm looking for and I said it's not that, I don't want him to go to the board but I'm asking for a face to face apology and requesting that he gets further education around mental health issues and gains more insight to his behaviours. 

its not just for myself that I decided to carry this out, it's more about the awareness that there are people still working in the wrong field if they have this attitude especially when there is huge mental health turnover through ED and how many others just accept this behaviour. If I can make a difference for another mental health client in the future by identifying these individuals and stigma behaviours that are in no way acceptable under any circumstances. 

That's why I'm excited about lived experience peer support because people can get the knowledge what's acceptable and if it doesn't feel right have the skills and rescources to also be part of change for themselves and in the future. 

 

I really hope this not only speaks to people who indentify with similar experiences but also encourages you also that you are human and deserve to be treated fairly and with respect always, no one is less than another no matter what their experiences but each of us can be confident to use your voice and don't let the stigma survive without a fight. Often when we are in the middle of crisis it's the last thing we think of but consider is the treatment towards you acceptable or does it effect you more than you realise.

trust me it took many years of accepting the fact that I put myself in that position and allowed it, but just to know that on these two occasions advocating for myself came help  and the right organisations to advocate and assist without any judgment just support and guidance for positive outcomes and through this process we all can make changes where desperately required with the right information and rescources. 


17 REPLIES 17

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

Hi @Sandy-66 , Smiley Happy

 

Wow! Such a relatable post. Smiley Surprised I'm so sorry for the anguish that the system and other people in your life have inflicted upon you. I have experianced much of the same. As a result, I've avoided the system for many years now, so I guess I'm fairly oblivious as to where we actually are today. Probably much to my own detriment, I guess I picture much of the mental health landscape with the context of my own bad memories.

 

I'm sorry to hear that your more recent experiances have still been poor. I know there's been a great deal of push now to get all "mental health emergencies" out of the traditional ERs and into dedicated "mental health ERs"; largely for the reasons that you allude to - that the traditional ER environment, staff and resources simply aren't up to the task of tending to people facing mental health emergencies.

 

I myself have tried advocating for my own concerns regarding the mental health system. People do seem to have paid some attention, but I must say that I've never had such an encouraging reaction as what you report. Responses within 2 hours?? Smiley Surprised Responders who actually want to engage with you and understand your grievances better? I should be so interesting! Smiley Very Happy TBH, I think maybe I come off a little too bitter - too ornery, maybe even unintentionally rude. Also I hold a rather unpopular opinion that death/suicide is not the worst fate that can befall someone. I think those vices put a lot of people off and discourages them from engaging with me. Smiley Sad

 

You mentioned that you got positive reactions from 2 organizations you got in contact with? Do you mind if I ask who?

 

SANE has a seminar coming up - I believe next Tuesday evening (@Daisydreamer , could you please clarify?) - about advocacy in the mental health realm. Maybe you might be interested in attending?

 

I was also very sorry to read about your experiances being gaslighted by people close to you and can relate to that very much as well - as well as the snowballing effect of one person creating an unfair depiction of you, and then just seeing that contaminating everything in your life.

 

Personally, I've never been able to figure out how we wipe the slate clean when that happens.

 

It does leave me with lingering concerns about what remains in my official records. If the future ever seems so promising that I am willing to reach out for help again, am I going to have a battle on my hands, trying to erase the contaminated perception of me that my previous therapists created? It has weighed on my mind, from time to time.

 

I hope the future looks much brighter for you then the past, @Sandy-66 !Smiley Happy Same goes for us all! Smiley Happy

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

Hi @Sandy-66 @chibam The Topic Tuesday this coming Tuesday 19th October is on Tools for Advocacy. It was postponed from September but if you follow this link here you can support the original post and will then get an email on the evening just before it begins. Hope you can both make it as you would both have some invaluable experience and knowledge in this area Smiley Happy

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

Thanks, @Zoe7 Smiley Happy. I'm looking forward to it, and I really hope I can make it, too!

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

@chibam  Thanks for your feedback and support it sounds like you related. I'm sure there are many that do, but just accept things being vulnerable and putting trust in the people that are put there to support and understand which as we know isn't always true or available. 

I see we both got a message about Tuesdays topic being on advocacy inviting us to come on board to share and discuss our own experiences and accessing services. As I'm new and not that tech savvy I noticed there was a link which I presume is a discussion online???

 

Only because in your message you also mentioned a seminar on Tuesday that I might like to attend, is this the same event?? Is it something you can attend in person or a discussion online??

Maybe you or someone else could clarify this because I'm keen to be available to share what I believe is valuable insight and experiences that could assist others. 

As with your question around who were the two organisations that assisted me so effectively, let me explain 

 

There are quite a few organisations available that play different roles so when you google advocacy in mental health they all come up but only a couple actually advocate directly on behalf of the consumer. When a consumer has a specific complaint regarding an incident it's often advised to attempt an outcome within the individuals organisation they work at, and if you are not satisfied with the results then as a consumer you can take it further accessing an advocacy service. 

SA Health website just gives you all the information and organisations available 

HCSCC (Health and Commission Service complaints Commissioner) They can play an important role but they don't directly advocate for either parties, they remain impartial and seek for suitable outcomes.  
MHCSA (Mental Health Coalition of SA) work more around advice and support services within Mental Health Community 

The Office of Public Advocate Mental Health refers concerns to the Office of the Chief Psychiatrist. 
SA Mental Health Commission more around rescources and articles. 
LELAN empowering workforce and consumers to make change, encouraging and directing if required but not their role.  

Now to get to the two services that did make a difference and supported me not only back two years ago but once again in relation to the most recent event. 

Communityvisitorsscheme.sa.gov.au &

Office of the Chief Psychiatrist 

(ensuring the rights of people with lived experience of Mental Health)

 

I suppose back sharing my experiences was about a one of incident or event it was very complex and over a long timeframe so both these organisations came on board very quickly and efficiently. So when this recent event occurred normally I would have been advised to commence at the beginning steps as I explained before but I went directly back to contacting Community Visitors Scheme knowing they had my history and as luck would have it I even got the same women that assisted me back then, she remembered it all so clearly and supported the fact that I've skipped the first step and taken to her for advice and support. In this case I haven't taken to the Office of the Chief Psychiatrist as they are the last point of call and sit on top of the whole system when there is high need and important attention required. 

So just by sharing with this same women she's heard my concerns and taken it on board totally and understand why to the point where she is doing the whole process herself so I don't have to keep repeating myself and she has the history and insight to carry this out efficiently I have no doubt. She is going to keep in regular contact with me throughout until I receive the outcome I'm looking for. 

I hope all this information is as useful as it has been for me. It took me a long time to navigate and sift through each option until I found the right and most effective of all the services that worked for me as an individual. 

let me know about Tuesday and what my options are and how to go about it. Much appreciated 

 

have a good day 

 

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

@Zoe7  Thanks for the update about Tuesdays topic event being on advocacy and tools I definitely have worked through to find the most effective and would be happy to share my experiences and outcomes. By clicking on the link you sent I'm presuming it takes me to the discussion?? Is it a chat session?? and what time would it start in SA?

 

thanks again for the invite 

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

Hi @Sandy-66 By clicking on the link it will take you to the thread about the discussion being this week. If you support the first post you will receive an email on the night just before it begins. The discussion will be held on that same thread. Do not be put off by the initial date - it was meant to be a couple of weeks ago but had to be postponed until this coming Tuesday. The discussion works just like all other threads on here - there is a link to what to expect at the end of the first post on that thread. The discussion starts at 7pm (AEDT) so 6.30pm for SA. Hope that helps Smiley Happy

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

Yep @Sandy-66 

Sadly STIGMA in Mental health is still alive.

 

Sorry you had such a long inadequate experience with services. 

 

Thank you for your reccomendations.  I do not live in same state, but am looking for similar here.

 

Welcome to the forum

Apple

Smiley Happy

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???


@Sandy-66 wrote:

I see we both got a message about Tuesdays topic being on advocacy inviting us to come on board to share and discuss our own experiences and accessing services. As I'm new and not that tech savvy I noticed there was a link which I presume is a discussion online???

 

Only because in your message you also mentioned a seminar on Tuesday that I might like to attend, is this the same event?? Is it something you can attend in person or a discussion online??

Maybe you or someone else could clarify this because I'm keen to be available to share what I believe is valuable insight and experiences that could assist others.


Yes, it's the same event as what I was talking about.

 

Basically it's just like any other thread on this forum, except it's only "open" for about 90 mins this next Tuesday. After that, it still exists on the forums, so everybody can still read it. But it'll be locked up so that nobody can add any new posts.

 

So essentially, it's a live discussion taking place on the forums here over 90 mins or so.

 


@Sandy-66 wrote:

There are quite a few organisations available that play different roles so when you google advocacy in mental health they all come up but only a couple actually advocate directly on behalf of the consumer. When a consumer has a specific complaint regarding an incident it's often advised to attempt an outcome within the individuals organisation they work at, and if you are not satisfied with the results then as a consumer you can take it further accessing an advocacy service. 

SA Health website just gives you all the information and organisations available 

HCSCC (Health and Commission Service complaints Commissioner) They can play an important role but they don't directly advocate for either parties, they remain impartial and seek for suitable outcomes.  
MHCSA (Mental Health Coalition of SA) work more around advice and support services within Mental Health Community 

The Office of Public Advocate Mental Health refers concerns to the Office of the Chief Psychiatrist. 
SA Mental Health Commission more around rescources and articles. 
LELAN empowering workforce and consumers to make change, encouraging and directing if required but not their role. 


To be honest, that does my head in. But then, beaurocratic stuff usually does.Smiley Frustrated I'm not good with it. I can only imagine how it must be for others. Especially when your probably still emotionally wound up about whatever mistreatment you've suffered - and probably your original problems piled on as well!

 

And, no doubt, the beaurocratic mechanisms differ from state-to-state, too. Smiley Frustrated It sounds like one of the major things we should be advocating for at the moment is a much more intuitive process for getting grievances resolved.

 

For me, it took a long time before I felt inclined to try to address the things that were done to me. And even today, I'm totally lost as to whether the problems were/are my fault; or if I'm making mountains out of molehills, ect., ect. There's a section of Reddit called "Am I The Asshole?" I could probably write a whole novel's worth of questions regarding the experiances I had in therapy.

 

So that's a whole can of worms in itself, in terms of airing your grievances. Not only do you need to settle your mind as to whether or not the behavior you were subjected to qualifies as mistreatment; but you also have to feel safe that whoever you talk to won't brand you as being the asshole in the equation. That's why I can't talk to anyone I know IRL about what I went through in therapy, because in my life, I'm always the one who stuffs up.

 

And adding yet another layer of confusion to it all is the fact that you repeatedly mention a "chief psychiatrist". Well some of my mistreatment came at the hands of a psychiatrist, but the worst of it came at the hands of a psychologist. So who deals with that? The "chief psychologist"?

 

As I say, this all seems to be such an overwhelming marathon for someone who is already broken, and feeling quite powerless. No wonder so much abuse goes unreported. The people who do dive into the reporting gauntlet sound like they all deserve VCs.

 

My hat goes off to you, @Sandy-66 , for having the savviness and fortitude to go through it all.Smiley Very HappyHeart

Re: STIGMA IN MENTAL HEALTH-STILL ALIVE???

Not sure if your aware, @Sandy-66 , but the talk is starting right now at this thread:

https://saneforums.org/t5/Special-Events/Topic-Tuesday-Tools-for-Advocacy-Tues-19th-October-7-00-8-3...

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